Friday, October 23, 2009

Frazzled Thoughts

We are frazzled females living life on the edge. My question is when did busyness become a virtue? It seems to me that running around like a decapitated chicken should indicated bad time management, a lack of discipline, poor planning or the inability to work efficiently. We, however, tend to wear it like a badge of honor. Living on the busyness treadmill with the mind on autopilot. Some women I know are earnestly striving to win the busyness competition. They rattle off all the things they do in a day. Then they raise an eyebrow to see if you can match their “contributions” to society. It is like a contest: the Amazing Busyness Race.

We as women define ourselves by what we do, instead of by who we are. We appear significant and worthy when we have a list of accomplishments. Society expects us to have a full resume. So, we are continually trying to prove ourselves, live up to the expectations of others and appear in control. All of which can be addictive, it is after all called a workaholic.

Granted we live in a speed-driven culture: do-it-all, have-it-all, over-achieve-it-all and all in less time. What, may I ask, are we doing with all of this effort of doing? We have loaded down our cart with rocks. We are exhausted from dragging all of these rocks around. If we were honest, we would admit that most of the rocks are not even ours.

We have become “people pleasers”. We seem unable to say no to a request. Since we won’t say “no”, we get busier and busier. This allows distractions to rush in and divert us from our priorities. We are tricked into thinking if we do not take care of the rock that no one else will. We take on impossible schedules and proceed to beat ourselves up for not completing all of the projects we have taken on. Stolen moments to ourselves are rarely enjoyed thanks to the guilt: it that tells us to get up and get busy.

We do not have to look far to find distractions. We have gadgets to provide noise and information over-load. 24 hours a day, 7 days a week, 365 days of the year and from almost anywhere we are bombarded with the worlds problems. Remember the good old days when the television cut off at night with the national anthem and did not resume until the 5am farm report?

So activity is bad? No, I fully agree that we should have full days of rest, activity and play. We occasionally should have spurts of activity. We, however, should not be perpetually busy. If that is the case, we are not controlling our life, our life is controlling us. It is as if life has the accelerator pedal stuck to the floorboard and is our driving our joy in life into the ground. We have become the society human-doers instead of human beings. The result of the frantic pace has been emotionally stressful, physically draining and spiritually crippling for all of us.

So is the answer is to become more efficient? We have become hyper-organized and highly efficient superwomen. So, it is not the case of living more efficiently. We just have to live more effectively. We need to spend the most time on what we value the most.

A monetary budget is a tool to track where your money is going. So, how about a time budget to see where you spend your time each day? Then use the classifications below to prioritize:
I. Urgent and Important (e.g. Family, Work)
II. Urgent and Unimportant (e.g. Email, Phone)
III. Not Urgent but Important (e.g. Prayer, Eat, Sleep, Exercise)
IV. Not Urgent and Not Important (e.g. TV, Internet, Games, Shopping)

Prioritize to identify the essential. Simplify to eliminate the rest. Perfection is not realistic, be protective of your time, absolutely positively schedule down time. When we are running around frantically, what goes first? Usually the answer is solitude! Everyone needs quiet time. But do not do it because of a rule (law), but because of grace. Make time for it. Separate yourself. Read. (deep reading…not microwave reading) Pray. And listen quietly.

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